There’s nothing like holding a sweet puppy in your arms as she sleeps. It brings me calmness.

As I am on my way to a bridal expo with my mom and her best friend to help my sister who is getting married this summer, I reflect on something I realized very recently.. I was not created and put on this earth to worry all day every single day of my life, more than what’s healthy. It’s been more unhealthy throughout my life. I worry about anything and everything, and often times I make up things to worry about. My dad calls me out on that, and so does my mom.

Jesus said that we WILL have trouble in this life, but He promises peace. (John 16:33). Why have I never embraced this? Pride, control, self-suffiency..

The more in control I want and make myself to be in this short time on earth, the more anxious I become, and the longer I dwell on things that are not important or worth worrying about. I’ve worried every day of my life for at least the past 10 years. 

Yes, I have an anxiety disorder, but I refuse to succumb to it any longer.. my parents have opened their home to me and I’m about to start a new job after a horrible past of habitually quitting jobs after not even a month. My family and friends love me no matter what .. and so does my Jesus. I am so so so blessed. Too blessed to worry all the time when it’s NOT necessary.

This is a short update, but I wanted to share my declaration I have just found.. we are not put on this earth by God to be miserable. He brought heaven down to earth in the person of Jesus Christ to bring His people the “peace that surpasses all understanding” (Philippians 4:7). Yes, there are times when all of us worry. I won’t deny or degrade that. But now, finally, I realized that I don’t have to worry miserably. I know God is in control, all the time. 

Thank you for getting this far in this post.. you reading this breaks the stigma of mental illness more than you think. 

Love,

Holli

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